A Mother's work is never done

For those of you who have been waiting your whole lives to hear me complain about my "perfect" husband- here's your post!

I've been angry, anxious and overbearing since having BR. I've considered therapy or meds for it on some days. Overall things have been smooth sailing but I don't think I'm alone when I say I'd like to scream obscenities at my husband some days.

Overall he tries to be helpful, in a man way. I'll clean up, don't you worry about- walk in to the supposed "clean" room and yea, its just never my idea of clean. But so what, I've dealt with that for the 4 years now that we've been together.

A whole nother level of anger comes when it involves sleep. He offers what seems like genuine help in the middle of the night. I'll get her up and feed her or put her back to sleep. Somehow this always comes back to bite me in the ass in the form of asshole-ish-ness in the morning. Like its somehow 10 times worse when he is up at night than if I were to be. So I've decided I will quit allowing it. I'm sure he will still put up a (half ass) fight. But its always only seconds from sitting downstairs with her that I hear his snoring upstairs. So much for really being concerned. I however am awake 90 percent of the time he is up with her, so why not just get up myself and avoid A-hole-ish-ness in the morning?

I've finally come out and told him a few times, after stewing in the reclined with her in my arms all night, that is also a full time job for me to feed her, not to mention the other full time job of cleaning house and taking care of the other kid. I feel like I should be paid (or at least thanked!!) most days, its that hard and exhausting at moments to keep up with it all.

Now I'm off to cook, ,clean and feed the baby with my body. Have a nice day all!

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THE END

Now that we have reached and surpassed the "safe zone" I am so ready to meet this baby girl. But I think she has been sent to me to teach me patience. NO ONE thought we'd see the pregnancy through the 37th week and here we are two days from 38 weeks. She's gonna be a stubborn one from birth. I'm sure of it. :) I don't mind carrying her around awhile longer (though people might get tired of seeing my belly since NOTHING fits anymore) but it's the swelling, mood swings, back pain, etc. that I am SO DONE WITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! As I sit here contracting now (it happens every weekend when my shot wears off) I am wondering will we EVER see THE END?

You know your pregnant when... (reader discretion advised)

You get excited for extra mucousy discharge because it might be ur plug and it might signal labor is nearing!

You change ur undies 4 times a day without thinking twice because u peed urself and the liner didn't catch it all.

You get a little depressed when u think about not being able to eat 4 blueberry muffins and just blame it on eating for two.

Or 6 tacos...

U have chocolate chip cookies and candy for lunch because ur too tired to make anything else.

Ur feet are swollen to the size of small babies!

U cry at commercials for food that sounds good.

U cry at the drop of a dime and at other times find things so ridiculously hilarious people think u may fallen off ur rocker.

...........................

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37 week update

Well we went in hoping I'd dilated more so he'd take the stitches out and let me go but no such luck. Still just 1 cm. They talked me into the last shot because my doctor is gone most of this weekend and is scared I'd go into labor while he's gone. Needless to say I was disappointed, upset, frustrated and overwhelmed. I cried. A lot. I cried to my husband and my favorite nurse Kelly who always cheers me up. I measured 39 weeks. I've come to expect to be large.. Her Heart rate was 156. And Kelly promised I would not be pregnant in July... In fact she said she would be happy to tell him to induce me if I'm still pregnant on the 21st. OH LORDY I hope not! :) My poor husband was sooo apologetic. He apparently thinks I might lose it soon if I don't have her. I should use this to my advantage but really I feel bad for him.

By the time I left I had dried most of it up and even made some jokes in the lobby with some volunteers I've gotten to know while I waited on my car from Valet. While down there some random (white trash) woman asked if I was just having one. I replied "yep just one" and she didn't even respond to me just walks away and says very loudly to her friend "OH MY GOD! DID U SEE HER??? SHE LOOKS LIKE SHE IS AT LEAST HAVING TWOOOO BABIES! SHE"S HUGE!" So I sat down and calmly said to whoever was listening "well at least when I have my baby I won't be fat anymore. she still will be. So what's her excuse..." To which one of the very friendly volunteers says "you should have asked her when she was due with her twins".. hahahahahaha! I immediately was cheered up of any left over frustration.

I left and was still bummed- every time I have to tell another person it won't be soon I wanna cry again. But I got to my mom's and the sweet kids got out of the pool to give me a kiss. Well not my kid but Kyrsten and Wylie did. So I asked Wy If I could take him to lunch for his bday which was weeks ago and we'd do some shopping in this 95 degree heat.. Of course he wanted to! And of course he picked the worst place possible... Fiesta. But it was delish and I honestly don't think it alone could do much more damage to my ankles... LOL!

By the time we were done I was completely at peace with all of it. BR will be here when she gets here. Even if that's when Dr is out of town, on Dax's birthday party day, On Dax's actual 1st birthday, Uncle T dogs birthday or our anniversary. Either way it won't be longer than two weeks and that's a short time to wait for one of God's most amazing gifts! the gift of LIFE! :) Besides, I needed taught a little extra patience before I have two little boogers to deal with.

A side note: My conversation with my darling baby boy this morning

G: Uh OH MOmmy I pooping my pants
B: let's go to the potty quick
G: no my gma puts my underwears on me and I sit on her potty
B: we can put ur underwears on here and sit on ur potty here
G: No, my gma do it. I already pooped in my dipey.
B: Well let's change it quick before gma gets here to pick u up.
G: No I hiding from u. I messing with this light (rubbing a lamp and pretending it's super important)
B: Ok fine If u don't come over here by the time I count to 3- U can go to ur room for a time out.
G: No mommy u not count to 2. U not put me in time out. U not spank my booty.
B: then get over here and lay down. Oh look there's gma in the driveway now
G: (runs over and plops down legs in the air for a diaper change) Ok mommy U change my dipey now and I not get in time out or get spanking...
B: Oh Grahammy! I am NEVER teaching ur sister to talk. EVER!

I love that little boy and I am constantly amazed by how his little mind works. Faster than MOmmy and Daddy's most days that's for sure. :)

And one more thing: how my husband has amused me today...
He had gotten dressed, had shoes on and was about to walk out the door when I noticed his shirt was inside out. And then he calls when I'm at the dr office waiting on him and he says "I'm on Veterans instead of Main... I don't know where I was going so Umm I"m gonna be late"... and he has been sooooo apologetic because I didn't get the news I wanted at the dr. he's too cute.

not the way i wanted to spend my Sunday...

Went in to hospital after contracting all night. Sure enough contracting every 2-5 minutes when I get there. Found out I have dialated to 1 cm. Stayed all day just to find out
1. The painful contractions every 4 or so minutes aren't doing anything more to my cervix.
2. They aren't taking my stitches out just yet. Worse case is I rip my cervix trying to dialate further. ( no biggie right?)
3. My blood pressure is borderline high. (Ya think?)
4. Apparently most people get told to come in when contractions are 5 minutes or closer... I should wait apparently until my water breaks or I feel the babies head poking out! Lol!
5. I was given the option to stay all night or go home... umm... I am starving and if u say this baby ain't coming I'm sorry but ur bed is not the place I wanna stay!

So we left and promptly went to schooners and ordered onion rings, hot wings, and chicken planks with the spicy dipping sauce. Ate all that then went to Schucks and got some pineapple and some jalapeno poppers. Gonna go for a bumpy ride later and see if we can't make this happen. Then again maybe I will just get them up to 3 minutes apart and never sleep again until she comes. Lol!

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Leakage (another one of those Read at your own risk)

I am leaking from:
My breasts so much so that I think I could pump today.
Elsewhere be it pee or amniotic fluid. I do not know.
My eyes every time anything even remotely upsetting happens or is mentioned.

Do they make plugs for any of these?

Baby Bella Update

Little girl isn't going to be so little it seems. She is measuring in at approx. 7lbs 5 oz! And her head looked to be most of the weight (its measurement corresponds with a 40 week baby's average size) YIKES! Epidural now please? He also said her head is locked in down there and that I was all baby and a lot of it. That made me feel better for all those people's comments these past few months! He wants me to stay on meds until 38 weeks still but even the nurse said we could deny the progesterone next week and I think I will quit my pills soon. Doctor said the placenta is starting to calcify and every thing looks great really so I am thinking anytime (sooner is better than later) would be GREAT!


I really can't believe it's all about to happen though. I don't know how prepared I am. More so I don't know how prepared my baby boy is. I live for that child and I can't stand to see him upset so I really hope the whole bringing another child into this world doesn't upset him to much.