Day of Disappointment

I hesitate to even write this post after our lecturer's speech on Jonah today but as you know I use this blog as a journal so I am going to go with it anyway.

I HATE HATE HATE to prepare and prepare for the day ahead and then have it all go to crap. (excuse my language- Yes Graham CRAP is a bad word.)

We implemented a little system where we prepare Graham for the day ahead the night before. It helps with getting his "engine running" in the morning when he knows what to expect for the day. Before this little trick we had many meltdowns (both kid and Mommy) and it was hard to ever get him out the door for anything. And this has worked for us for almost a year now.

Knowing we need to give this heads up, I try to plan ahead (at least a day) to minimize stress on the both of us (and now Bella and daddy too).

So when I prepare bags, clothes, the car, etc all in advance only to have it snowball into a dreadful day- I get a little upset. Ok, more than a little upset. I am starting to take it personally. Now I know sickness can't be helped. But a lack of caring that it takes a lot of planning to get two kiddos out for the day irritates me. And not to mention the DISAPPOINTMENT when I tell him the day isn't going to go as planned.

I know kids need to have disappointment to learn and grow. But if I could shield them from it I would because I can't stand the look in his eye and the sadness on his face or the real tears sliding down his cheeks. It breaks this momma's heart. And he doesn't forget. And it's my fault. And then I end up offering ice cream and playing at the park and extra cartoons to make him happy. And sometimes I am so agitated I lose my patience with him and it's not his fault. I just wish there were a way to prevent this from happening and still be able to prepare him the way he needs us to.

I'm over reacting in a way today. But I know that it's because it's not the first time he has been disappointed lately.

And that's my rant for the day folks.

go with the flow...

We've been wanting to potty train G since, well.. since he was born. LOL! But recently he has seemed more "ready" than ever! And although if I had it MY WAY I would wait until after our week long vacation to start trying, he seems to think NOW is the time. SOOO I'm happy to report that he has made all pee pees in the potty today! {insert HAPPY DANCE here}
We are really proud and his teeth will probably rot out from the candy and ice cream rewards.

Simply simple

I've been trying to eliminate some stress and anxiety in my life by slowing down to take in the simple things...

Simple things make me happy. Simple things like

Baby sighs
and baby thighs

Story times with G and being silly to see how hard I can make him giggle

Letting the kids be kids by playing in mud puddles and getting filthy in the sand box filled with rain water

Spontaneous Picnics in the park

Watching my husband be the best daddy ever

rocking baby
singing lullabys to baby

playing cards with Wy-diggity

chatting on the phone without looking at the time

walks with family or friends

drives in the country to see the corn being harvested and the trees starting to change

sitting in the sunshine

pumpkin spice lattes



It's amazing what can put a smile on your face when you turn off the tv, put down the cell phones and take it all in. I'm sure there's so many more I can come up with. But for now I'm going to sign off and take in more of life's simple things. And thank God I can slow down to appreciate them today.

Random Ramblings on this Drizzly Dreary Day

I'm impressed and not impressed, all at the same time, at Graham's new ability to open the fridge and retrieve anything he likes at any time.

We're working on removing clothing and putting on clothing for potty training... It may be awhile.

BellaRose is 3 months old! Where did the time go? She thinks she can sit up. She does these little crunches in her swing that make me giggle. She HAS to be held and patted and bounced and rocked just right to be put to sleep. She likes blowdryer and vacuum noise to calm her. She is truly a little princess. And I wouldn't have it any other way!

Fall seems to be here! Highs in the low 70's, drizzly dreary days, dark mornings- windows down, blankie,hoodie and jean weather, I LOVE IT!

I'm LOVE LOVE LOVING this new all natural online store- Meleleuca! My house, body, laundry etc all looks and smells amazing and is soft and clean all without having toxic chemicals in the house!

Balancing bills on a now weekly paycheck instead of the the twice a month one is a CHALLENGE! I'm about to turn this chore over to the hubs. I know I need to crack the whip on the spending but man it's tough!

Graham has a MOUTH on him. I don't know why I expected him to be a sweet, quiet, polite, kind, and innocent little guy for all his life----Look at his uncles!!!

We leave on vacation in Gulf Shores and the count down is 11 days and I'm crapping my pants with stress over packing, and driving and living in a house with family all week! Let's hope the sand, sun and waves can calm this anxious momma.

Did I mention we have another trip planned for January to Florida for a wedding on Graham's birthday??

We started Kindermusik last week and MOM2MOM this week. Super excited for time out with other mom's but a tad nervous about leaving princess with strangers in the nursery for 2 hrs a week (at MOM2MOM)! yikes!

I get my ring back this week!!! Remember that horrible saga where I thought (like a BIG DUMMY) it fit again and had to have it sawed into pieces so I didn't lose my finger when it didn't? Yea, its going to set us back $335 bucks... Oh well. I think I learned my lesson.


Lana told me today she has friends who live at school. :) She seems to be loving preschool and it still makes me sad to see her come home with her little bag.

I've started seeing a new chiropractor and a therapist. A chiro for back and neck pain (alot of which is caused by stress and being a mommy) and a therpist for anxiety and OCD behaviors (though those have been less and less lately). The multiple appointments and arranging child care and running (& affording gas) back and forth to Bloomington has me more stressed out and anxious and in pain (back and bank account) than I was before I decided this all was a good idea.

We got rid of the smart phones and I can see the need for them now. This one I have now is really really DUMB but I have to say my anxiety level is a little lower and I'm more laid back not having all the gizmo's and gadgets and whatnots on my phone. I've lost it a few times and not even freaked out. and I'm always leaving it in the car now to run inside somewhere. IT's actually kind of nice.

Graham says we live in a castle on 6th street. His mommy is the queen, his daddy the king, his sister the princess and he's the prince (sometimes he's a princess too depending on the day) last night, he told his aunt MaryBeth she was the BEAST! bahahahaha!!!

OK OK OK! I need to go do something productive like clean up lunch before the 3 sleeping beauty's wake up!

playing catch up

As I rocked my sick little baby girl in my arms and held one hand over her face to the noise of the blow dryer today, it hit me how incredibly blessed I am. I love little moments when God taps on my shoulder and says "isn't this the best?".

We've been working on bed, and meal time prayers with Graham. It is my absolute favorite time of day with him right now. At bed time we read a few books while laying in bed and then say our prayers. I've always told him at night that I thank God for him every day so now we thank God together for the important things in our life. He comes up with some two year old things like "tractor shows and parks and corn festival" to thank Him for and I love that sweet sweet innocence. :)

BellaRose is growing growing growing! They BOTH are. Graham is in 4 and 5T clothes and BellaRose in 6 months! ARGH! Make them stop!I am so grateful for my healthy little (big) boogers.

We got rid of our "smart" phones this week and the internet with it, we replaced it with really really dumb ones. LOL!! BUT----- It's going to save us 75 bucks a month. I am more relaxed already with it gone. How weird is that? I was entirely too tied to my phone and several times now I have not known where it was for hours and not even freaked out!

This week starts our full fall schedule. Monday- home or errands and appts Tues- Kindermusik, Wednesday- Mom's group at church, Thursday- 1st and 3rd playdate at Methodist church and Friday- chillax day! I tend to do better with a schedule so I am excited about this. The mom's group on Wednesday's is new to me and I'm a tad nervous/anxious about leaving my BR in "daycare (lamb2lamb)but mom time will be ok.

This fall weather is amazing! always makes me feel so refreshed and alive! CAn't wait for pumpkin patches and leaves turning and bonfires and halloween!

Love to all! I am going to try to update this more often for sure!

A Mother's work is never done

For those of you who have been waiting your whole lives to hear me complain about my "perfect" husband- here's your post!

I've been angry, anxious and overbearing since having BR. I've considered therapy or meds for it on some days. Overall things have been smooth sailing but I don't think I'm alone when I say I'd like to scream obscenities at my husband some days.

Overall he tries to be helpful, in a man way. I'll clean up, don't you worry about- walk in to the supposed "clean" room and yea, its just never my idea of clean. But so what, I've dealt with that for the 4 years now that we've been together.

A whole nother level of anger comes when it involves sleep. He offers what seems like genuine help in the middle of the night. I'll get her up and feed her or put her back to sleep. Somehow this always comes back to bite me in the ass in the form of asshole-ish-ness in the morning. Like its somehow 10 times worse when he is up at night than if I were to be. So I've decided I will quit allowing it. I'm sure he will still put up a (half ass) fight. But its always only seconds from sitting downstairs with her that I hear his snoring upstairs. So much for really being concerned. I however am awake 90 percent of the time he is up with her, so why not just get up myself and avoid A-hole-ish-ness in the morning?

I've finally come out and told him a few times, after stewing in the reclined with her in my arms all night, that is also a full time job for me to feed her, not to mention the other full time job of cleaning house and taking care of the other kid. I feel like I should be paid (or at least thanked!!) most days, its that hard and exhausting at moments to keep up with it all.

Now I'm off to cook, ,clean and feed the baby with my body. Have a nice day all!

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

THE END

Now that we have reached and surpassed the "safe zone" I am so ready to meet this baby girl. But I think she has been sent to me to teach me patience. NO ONE thought we'd see the pregnancy through the 37th week and here we are two days from 38 weeks. She's gonna be a stubborn one from birth. I'm sure of it. :) I don't mind carrying her around awhile longer (though people might get tired of seeing my belly since NOTHING fits anymore) but it's the swelling, mood swings, back pain, etc. that I am SO DONE WITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! As I sit here contracting now (it happens every weekend when my shot wears off) I am wondering will we EVER see THE END?

You know your pregnant when... (reader discretion advised)

You get excited for extra mucousy discharge because it might be ur plug and it might signal labor is nearing!

You change ur undies 4 times a day without thinking twice because u peed urself and the liner didn't catch it all.

You get a little depressed when u think about not being able to eat 4 blueberry muffins and just blame it on eating for two.

Or 6 tacos...

U have chocolate chip cookies and candy for lunch because ur too tired to make anything else.

Ur feet are swollen to the size of small babies!

U cry at commercials for food that sounds good.

U cry at the drop of a dime and at other times find things so ridiculously hilarious people think u may fallen off ur rocker.

...........................

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.1

37 week update

Well we went in hoping I'd dilated more so he'd take the stitches out and let me go but no such luck. Still just 1 cm. They talked me into the last shot because my doctor is gone most of this weekend and is scared I'd go into labor while he's gone. Needless to say I was disappointed, upset, frustrated and overwhelmed. I cried. A lot. I cried to my husband and my favorite nurse Kelly who always cheers me up. I measured 39 weeks. I've come to expect to be large.. Her Heart rate was 156. And Kelly promised I would not be pregnant in July... In fact she said she would be happy to tell him to induce me if I'm still pregnant on the 21st. OH LORDY I hope not! :) My poor husband was sooo apologetic. He apparently thinks I might lose it soon if I don't have her. I should use this to my advantage but really I feel bad for him.

By the time I left I had dried most of it up and even made some jokes in the lobby with some volunteers I've gotten to know while I waited on my car from Valet. While down there some random (white trash) woman asked if I was just having one. I replied "yep just one" and she didn't even respond to me just walks away and says very loudly to her friend "OH MY GOD! DID U SEE HER??? SHE LOOKS LIKE SHE IS AT LEAST HAVING TWOOOO BABIES! SHE"S HUGE!" So I sat down and calmly said to whoever was listening "well at least when I have my baby I won't be fat anymore. she still will be. So what's her excuse..." To which one of the very friendly volunteers says "you should have asked her when she was due with her twins".. hahahahahaha! I immediately was cheered up of any left over frustration.

I left and was still bummed- every time I have to tell another person it won't be soon I wanna cry again. But I got to my mom's and the sweet kids got out of the pool to give me a kiss. Well not my kid but Kyrsten and Wylie did. So I asked Wy If I could take him to lunch for his bday which was weeks ago and we'd do some shopping in this 95 degree heat.. Of course he wanted to! And of course he picked the worst place possible... Fiesta. But it was delish and I honestly don't think it alone could do much more damage to my ankles... LOL!

By the time we were done I was completely at peace with all of it. BR will be here when she gets here. Even if that's when Dr is out of town, on Dax's birthday party day, On Dax's actual 1st birthday, Uncle T dogs birthday or our anniversary. Either way it won't be longer than two weeks and that's a short time to wait for one of God's most amazing gifts! the gift of LIFE! :) Besides, I needed taught a little extra patience before I have two little boogers to deal with.

A side note: My conversation with my darling baby boy this morning

G: Uh OH MOmmy I pooping my pants
B: let's go to the potty quick
G: no my gma puts my underwears on me and I sit on her potty
B: we can put ur underwears on here and sit on ur potty here
G: No, my gma do it. I already pooped in my dipey.
B: Well let's change it quick before gma gets here to pick u up.
G: No I hiding from u. I messing with this light (rubbing a lamp and pretending it's super important)
B: Ok fine If u don't come over here by the time I count to 3- U can go to ur room for a time out.
G: No mommy u not count to 2. U not put me in time out. U not spank my booty.
B: then get over here and lay down. Oh look there's gma in the driveway now
G: (runs over and plops down legs in the air for a diaper change) Ok mommy U change my dipey now and I not get in time out or get spanking...
B: Oh Grahammy! I am NEVER teaching ur sister to talk. EVER!

I love that little boy and I am constantly amazed by how his little mind works. Faster than MOmmy and Daddy's most days that's for sure. :)

And one more thing: how my husband has amused me today...
He had gotten dressed, had shoes on and was about to walk out the door when I noticed his shirt was inside out. And then he calls when I'm at the dr office waiting on him and he says "I'm on Veterans instead of Main... I don't know where I was going so Umm I"m gonna be late"... and he has been sooooo apologetic because I didn't get the news I wanted at the dr. he's too cute.

not the way i wanted to spend my Sunday...

Went in to hospital after contracting all night. Sure enough contracting every 2-5 minutes when I get there. Found out I have dialated to 1 cm. Stayed all day just to find out
1. The painful contractions every 4 or so minutes aren't doing anything more to my cervix.
2. They aren't taking my stitches out just yet. Worse case is I rip my cervix trying to dialate further. ( no biggie right?)
3. My blood pressure is borderline high. (Ya think?)
4. Apparently most people get told to come in when contractions are 5 minutes or closer... I should wait apparently until my water breaks or I feel the babies head poking out! Lol!
5. I was given the option to stay all night or go home... umm... I am starving and if u say this baby ain't coming I'm sorry but ur bed is not the place I wanna stay!

So we left and promptly went to schooners and ordered onion rings, hot wings, and chicken planks with the spicy dipping sauce. Ate all that then went to Schucks and got some pineapple and some jalapeno poppers. Gonna go for a bumpy ride later and see if we can't make this happen. Then again maybe I will just get them up to 3 minutes apart and never sleep again until she comes. Lol!

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.0

Leakage (another one of those Read at your own risk)

I am leaking from:
My breasts so much so that I think I could pump today.
Elsewhere be it pee or amniotic fluid. I do not know.
My eyes every time anything even remotely upsetting happens or is mentioned.

Do they make plugs for any of these?

Baby Bella Update

Little girl isn't going to be so little it seems. She is measuring in at approx. 7lbs 5 oz! And her head looked to be most of the weight (its measurement corresponds with a 40 week baby's average size) YIKES! Epidural now please? He also said her head is locked in down there and that I was all baby and a lot of it. That made me feel better for all those people's comments these past few months! He wants me to stay on meds until 38 weeks still but even the nurse said we could deny the progesterone next week and I think I will quit my pills soon. Doctor said the placenta is starting to calcify and every thing looks great really so I am thinking anytime (sooner is better than later) would be GREAT!


I really can't believe it's all about to happen though. I don't know how prepared I am. More so I don't know how prepared my baby boy is. I live for that child and I can't stand to see him upset so I really hope the whole bringing another child into this world doesn't upset him to much.

having a voice

I love my doctor's office. I do. But... since implementing the chartless or electronic charts in their office I feel like there have been so many instances the quality of care is lower because of it. There have been times I think they have missed things because they don't have a paper chart in front of them. I as the patient am expected to give my full medical history at almost every visit when that should be something they have at their fingertips. I have to stay on top of things like never before, as if I don't have enough stress with this being a high risk pregnancy. Several of the nurses are great and even remember details from my first pregnancy. But doctor's nurse (who also saw me my whole first pregnancy, and has seen me weekly since week 28) acts as if I am a completely new patient each week. And I know she doesn't see as many patients as the other nurses in there. I hate pointing fingers but something is wrong with that picture that she can't remember the big things even- like me having a cerclage or getting weekly shots... or even a general- I'm a high risk pregnancy... I also feel like the communication has gone way down hill. Someone always going out to ask someone else what is supposed to be happening because its not written down anywhere. Its all very frustrating and stressful and overwhelming for an already stressed to the max mama. I have heard but not witnessed for myself that other dr offices in town have computers in each room and the nurse pulls up your chart before the doctor comes in and has it all there in front of him. At my office sometimes his nurse comes in, measures me, takes the heartbeat- sometimes tells me, most of the time I ask, then goes and writes something different in the computer. Then another nurse comes in to give me my injection. These are the AWESOME nurses who answer my questions, spend time with me calming me down after dr's nurse tells me I measured 4 weeks bigger. Or talks to me about one of the many extra medical issues I seem to have this time. Or how about how it was actually one of those AWESOME nurses who actually caught the hypothyroidism? And elevated heart rate? All things that can be (but luckily aren't in mine) a big deal in pregnancy. Well at least I pray they aren't or don't prove to be. Then dr comes in takes two looks at me and basically says every week: "keep doing what we've been doing what we've been doing and oh what is that by the way"... the dates of when things are going to be happening keep changing for instance for the longest time it was going to be 36 weeks for weaning off meds... now he says 38. It was going to be 36 weeks for taking the cerclage out... now its 38 as well. or this sono deal where they specifically told me it was to look at baby and get measurements and posistion etc... why else would I invite my mom along? It turns out its just to measure the cervix which once again is fine- duh u have been checking it weekly.

Don't get me wrong my doctor is amazing in many ways. Without him I truly believe my Grahammy would have been severely premature. Without him I believe this pregnancy could have gone way differently. I trust him fully. I just wish I could get some straight answers somedays. Is it too much to ask?

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.9

a hairy situation (reader discretion advised-graphic mental pictures may be created)

I'm vain. I want things to be orderly and neat when I go into have BR. I dont want nurses and doctors thinking to themselves "wow this girl needs to take better care of things" as I'm pushing out my beautiful baby girl. And Needless to say my legs aren't the only area that have been neglected with this big ol belly out front. I tried getting some stuff tidied up today and got out of shower to find the hair growing behind my knees is as long as my husbands! Ewwwwww!!! So I guess I will be back at it tomorrow. Lol! I just hope I dont have to do a marathon shaving job like today again until after she is out!

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

can i just say...

That now that things are "moving" again (if u know what i mean) that i am a much happier momma! Lol! It doesnt take much. And ps- im eating like a horse again now too which doesnt help the weight issue of not wanting to get up to where i was when i went in to have G. I think its inevitable!!! Im only 8 lbs away and im not retaining water or near as far along in the pregnancy. Oh goodness! But dr assures me that i shouldnt listen to all u naysayers! He's the only that can tell me how large this baby girl will be! Hee hee! Sono in 3 weeks to find out just that!

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

prayers requested

As many of you know my mom had carpal tunnel surgery a week ago today and since I'm now on bedrest she is taking care of Graham along with other kids. She isnt supposed to be doing this much this soon but she's crazy! So pray that she heals ok!
My Mother in Law had surgery Tuesday to replace her knee. She is recovering ok. A lot of pain but everyday is better. Pray she continues on her path to recovery!
Tuesday is also the day BellaRose decided to start acting up! So we've been to hospital twice this week and we need prayers that I can keep baking her a while longer! 6 weeks would be perfect! 4 is our short term goal! I've also began a new med and had to up my thyroid med and I've started swelling.
Today we got news that Martin's grandma fell and broke her hip and is having surgery today. Pray she recovers from this. She is 90.
Im so thankful for my amazing family and in laws! Please God keep them safe.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

THIS IS THE STUFF

I had a feeling when I awoke to a heavy footed husband upstairs trying to creep around to get ready for work at 5 am that my day might not go so well. Between loading the 30 lb two year old up in the pouring down rain and soaking my whole backside. Unloading him 20 minutes later at a friends house and soaking myself more. A doctors appointment where I kind of got told (or yelled at) I should be on bedrest but never saying those words. Then coming home with a sleeping baby I lugged upstairs to his room for his nap. I tried laying down myself but after 45 minutes of struggling to get a full breath and feeling my heart racing and having a heavy chest- I called the doctor. I left a message. I took my pulse- it was 120- about two times what a resting pulse should be. I called my husband to get our bp cuff which also takes a pulse from a friends house we loaned it out to. Dr's nurse called back and said if my symptoms hadn't calmed down and my pulse hadn't lowered I should make my first trip to the hospital for this pregnancy. During this phone call in walks my sister in law, niece, nephew and my husband's aunt. I don't think they picked up on it being an important phone call nor my current state of health. They were loud and disrruptive, only upsetting me more. I called my mom to tell her what was up and arrange for her to take Graham. As soon as Martin got home with the bp cuff and I took my pulse which was still 118, we packed up and Tiffany picked up my other nephew who was here and we headed out. My mom met us at the ER where we check in before going up to labor and delivery. By then I had had 3 contractions in about 20 minutes time only adding to my anxiety! They promplty wheel me up, take a urine sample, give my a gorgeous gown to put on and hook me up to all the monitors. We quickly saw I was contracting every 3-4 minutes and that became their priority. I also had a slight fever only making all of my symptoms a little more confusing. I got an IV for fluids, a terbutaline shot and a blood draw for labs all within a matter of minutes. Man they didn't waste time! Lol! The terbutaline stopped contractions almost immediately but made me feel sooo icky! I hate that stuff tho it is a great drug and works wonders! My blood work came back with elevated white blood cells tho my urine came back completely clean. With Graham an UTI was almost always the culprit so I was surprised tho I'd been to the dr earlier and had clean urine there too! So dr ordered iv antibiotics and wanted me monitored for another hr for contractions and then I could go home! And they were prompt with getting me out too! We both had predicted we'd be there until at least 9 and we weren't!
So on the way home my latest favorite song came on our Christian station and I was reminded
"this is the stuff that drives me crazy, this is the stuff that's been getting to me lately,in the middle of my little mess, i forget how big I'm Blessed. This is the stuff that gets under my skin, and I've got to trust U know exactly what UR doing. might not be what i would choose but this is the stuff U use" "so break me of impatience, conquer my frustrations, I've got a new appreciation, its not the end of the world"
Could this apply more to my day? :)
Praise God for protecting us yesterday! And may HE keep reminding me that this is the stuff HE uses.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

BR update and more

I've made it to 30 weeks with no hospital visits! However there has been a few times lately I should have gone. I admit that and my Doctor agreed and wasnt too happy with me today. We did get it decided to up my progesterone to twice a week and dr visits to once a week so those lucky ladies get to see me every Tuesday and Friday now and dr on every tuesday. And my hips wont catch a break in between injections. But if keeps my baby girl a cooking til she's done then so be it. She is only measuring two (and a little bit) weeks ahead My iron was up so the diet is working-hooray! Im thankful because that means no supplement for me which would have caused a whole host of other problems. They rechecked my thyroid levels but i dont have them back yet. So I'm hanging tight (not in a very good mood today...) for now. Right now im waiting on a call back concerning my racing heart, short of breath and heavy chest... will keep ya posted on that one.

In other news, my mom's surgery on Friday went great, she is already back to her superwoman self trying to do too much. Gotta admire that in her. I got the opposite personality. My MIL is out of surgery today and in recovery as we speak. She should be going up to her room soon and beginning her recovery process.
Im looking forward to Easter this weekend. And my baby brother visiting for a week!!! I sure do miss his smart mouth and bad attitude. ;) we were able to use the pregnancy and kid as a darn good excuse to cut back our places to go to only 2 on sunday. It should be a great weekend.

For now thats all ive got! Please keep our family in your prayers as well as the mom's as they recover!

Love to all! B

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

BellaRose Belly Pictures

I got my pictures back today. I love them all so much. Here are a few of my favorites!

Did they really just say that???

DO I really look that big???

Ok, I realize I am 7+ months pregnant and measuring big and only 4'10" so my baby has no where to go out but the comments I have been getting this past month are beyond me.

Cashier: So when ya due? Any day now? Me: nope, not til end of june... Cashier: oh boy thats gonna be a big mamajama huh?

Brother in Law: U look ummm well uncomfortable... ( to his defense he was trying to be nice... I think...)

Some random dude at hospital: "girl u bout to explode aint cha?"

some lady at a garage sale: when are u due? Me: end of june Her: is it twins?

multiple people including lots of family: she has no where to go but out... maybe she will be more her daddy's size (just what I was afraid of)...

yea folks... it's all true. And there's some I am not remembering I'm sure.

Have I told you lately

That I love them? Today has been a rough one with little to no energy, contractions on and off and the desire to do absolutely nothing. I am so thankful for my husband who takes care of me and insists I rest while he takes care of me, the little guy and the house. I am so blessed to have Graham to make me laugh and almost burst with love at the seams. I even got a visit from my niece and nephews and my mom today and they sure brightened my day as well!

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

crumbs!!!

So it's seeming to be the point in my pregnancy where my uterus doesnt want to behave. Ive started having contractions more regularly than is comfortable for myself, my doctor and my family. Guess it means time to lay low and quit cleaning! But there lies the biggest problem- something that can only be describes as a CRAZY feeling- I get it quite often now... to clean! I have never been the cleaningest person ever before in my life but something about this pregnancy makes me feel ocd or obsessed or something. I dont like it, my husband feels like I undermine him I'm sure because I'm always going over what he has just done with a fine toothed comb and then making my adjustments. Crumbs! I hate crumbs on the counter or stuck on food in the sink or grime on the stove top or little food droppings on the floor around Graham's chair. All of it makes me spin out of control and into a frenzy of cleaning! And one thing leads to another and next thing i know ive organized a closet, swept, mopped, vaccuumed, dusted, wiped down couters and table tops etc. Which reminds me i had better tell my husband about cleaning the fridge because its probably going to be my next victim if i go nuts again... for now its "rest time" just what the doctor ordered- like really he insisted... or else!!!

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

this did not end well...

He was just trying to be cute and get a laugh outta me. Which he did, i snapped the pictured then in an instant the toliet seat slid down around his neck. It was loose enough it didnt choke him but tight enough there was no getting it off... I have to admit I was panicking, thinking of the 911 call... uhhh yes my 2 yr old son just got his toliet seat stuck on his head... daddy walked in for lunch to us both crying. He looked for big scissors to cut it off with no luck in finding any... the idea freaked me out anyway with as much as he was flailing around! It was then that i had a flash back to my dear little brother Travis, who always had his head stuck in something... BUTTER! Let's butter his head up and pull it out... yes pertroleum jelly or even vegetable oil might have been a better choice but we were desperate and in the moment and out came the stick of butter. He held really still and let us butter up his head and ears and forhead... he loves butter... and daddy was able to pull hard and get it off but not without bruising the tops of his poor ears!!! Graham quickly settled down and licked the butter off my shirt that he had rubbed on there in the struggle and holding and calming afterwards. He also gets his second bubble bath of the day to wash the butter out of his hair. Now we have a funny story to tell... ???

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

going all techy on myself

Im posting this from my phone. Aren't i a smart one? This could get addictive!

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

going all techy on myself

Im posting this from my phone. Aren't i a smart one? This could get addictive!

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Power of Prayer

Power of Prayer
During today’s sermon on Acts 3:1-10, “First Healing”, I was overcome with such joyous tears in remembering a time I felt “healing” by prayer.
When I went into premature labor around 24 weeks in my first pregnancy and I was in the hospital being told there was a good chance I would be going to a bigger hospital to have a VERY premature baby I broke down. I was terrified and lost. I remember my doctor coming in and asking if he could say a prayer for us at one point and I began to think back to other experiences when someone prayed for us in a hospital. It usually meant a bad outcome was expected… So as you can imagine I was hesitant to allow him. It was the last thing I should have felt at that time. But we did let him pray for us, he stood around my hospital bed and held hands with all in the room and he asked for God for healing. That He might keep me and my baby safe and let this pregnancy come to term so that we would have a healthy little boy. In that instant I felt a strange calm. I might not have looked it on the outside but I felt it in my heart. No matter what, we were going to be ok. And we were. We made it to 37 weeks and I gave birth to the most amazing gift, a healthy, beautiful baby boy we named Charles Graham. I thank HIM every day for that healing.
Now that I am in the midst of my second pregnancy and had surgery as a precaution around 13 weeks when my Doctor asked again if he could pray for me I did not hesitate, in fact I wanted to yell “PLEASE DO!!!” He again asked for healing and that God would allow this surgery to enable me to have a healthy pregnancy and a full term baby again. I am doing great and I have all the Faith in God that in 3 short months I will have yet another beautiful, healthy blessing to hold in my arms.
Dr. Nord offered what he had. Even he as a doctor could not promise me healing, but he could pray that God would grant me that. Dr. Nord’s Mission Statement is “ Ministering the love of Christ through healthcare”, I’ve seen this hanging in his office many times over the past 8-10 years I’ve been a patient there and the reality of those words finally hit me today. And wouldn’t you know that’s exactly what I needed at that moment. Thank God for a Dr. Nord who has been such a blessing to our family just by being a good Christian and offering us the power of prayer.

Brenda Rebbec

Day 15: Blog Challenge

Day 15: A Picture of something you want to do before you die


It'd take me a while to find a picture of me in my thinner days, so there isn't one here. Possibly when I have time to dig later I will post one. But that's what I would like for myself and my family is to be "healthy" again. Not asking for the size 0 I was in high school not even the 6 I wore in college. Just to be a healthier weight so that I can enjoy everyday with my amazing family.

Day 14: Blog Challenge

Day 14: Someone you could not picture ur life without.


I choose Graham. He lights up my life everyday and my life has drastically changed since the day I gave birth to him, all for the better. I love my little man.

Day 13: Blog Challenge

Day 13: A picture of your favorite band or artist

I am "stuck like glue" on this duo!!

Day 12: blog challenge

Day 12: a picture of something u love

I cannot imagine my life without music. And a whole lot of other things... But I had to pick one and didn't go all sappy with Family! :)

Day 11: Blog Challenge

Day 11: A picture of something you hate.

Truly it's a love/hate relationship. I'd love it if I had enough to share with everyone. I love it when there's enough to pay bills, But let's face it that rarely happens... SO I hate that it rules over our lives and that it's gone before it's here most months, and that it's soooooooo disgustingly dirty!

Day 10 of the blog challenge

Day 10: A picture of the person you do the most crazy things with.

My Family, but particularly my smelly, balding 3 little (but bigger than me) brothers. :)

Blog Challenge: Days 7, 8, 9

Day 7: A picture of my most treasured item. The worry rock was my grandpa's. It was in his pocket the night he passed away. My gma gave it to me before the funeral and said he would have wanted me to have it.

Day 8: A picture that makes me laugh. Can u really not guess which one?? LOL! Martin's grandma was being given a lot of crap for not keeping her eyes open in pictures at her 90th birthday party... So this is what she did next. Gosh I love her. :)

Day 9: A picture of someone who has gotten me through a lot. My granny. She has been my "worry rock". I don't know many people who can say their gma is their best friend.

Blog Challenge: Catch up days 4, 5, & 6

Day 4: A picture of your night

Mommy watches on as Daddy plays with Grahammy. This is how most nights go around here. Mommy plays with Graham all day and Daddy gets nights. Ok so maybe we fight over him IF he's being a cute boy.. LOL!

Day 5: A picture of your favorite memory

I considered Graham's birth for here but without the man of my dreams I would not have him either...

Day 6: A picture of a person you would like to trade places with for a day.

I would give anything to get inside my Baby Boy's head for a day. It looks like such a fun job to be him. :)

Day 3: Blog Challenge

Day 3: A picture of the cast from your favorite show.

MIKE & MOLLY

Here ya go. After watching it on DVR last night and laughing out loud hysterically at it, we agreed this is one of our new favorites. If you haven't seen it yet, you should!

Blog Challenge: Day 2

Day 2: Post a picture of you and the person you have been the closest with the longest.My Momma. She carried me in her womb from May 1983 until Jan 30th of 84. And has been there for me all of my 27 years. :)

30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 1

Day 1: A picture of yourself with 10 facts

1. I'm a procrastinator. Always have been, most likely always will be. I married one too.

2. I'm getting to the uncomfortable stage in pregnancy. I told my husband the other night "If U do this to me again, I will divorce you". Up until then I was unsure or whether or not I wanted another. I can honestly say now I am probably done after Ms. BellaRose makes her appearance.

3. I can say with 99.9% certainty that my Baby Girl's name will be BellaRose. Spelled like that, with no space.

4. I am TERRIFIED to have a girl. My mom thinks it is the universes way of paying me back... I believe her, hence being TERRIFIED!

5. I feel like my heart could burst with love for my husband, baby boy, baby girl, and nieces and nephews! It's ridiculous how much one can LOVE!

6. I wish money didn't exist. It just makes life so difficult and depressing somedays. And if we must exist in a world that relies on it, why can't I be rich?

7. I wish I could give my Grandma the moon and the stars. But mostly a nice house and a cushy bank account for the rest of her years.

8. I wish I were better at Forgiving and Forgetting. And telling others how I feel good and bad. Sometimes the bad is easier for me. Why is that?

9. I want to be closer to Christ this year. It has been a goal of mine for quite sometime and I'm working towards it.

10. I really want to go on a vacation with my boys before we add a member of the family. Even if it's just a weekend in the Dells at a water park. It would be oh so nice.

IT'S a GIRL!!!!!

Bella Rose Rebbec. possibly BellaRose Rebbec (we are playing with the idea of it). BRR just like her momma no matter how ya look at it.

I feel like I am still in shock. Growing up with all brothers I always pictured myself as the mom of boys. :) I am afraid a girl might turn out like me. hee hee. Which is fine now that I have finally grown up and learned some valuable life lessons but boy did I have some rough times in there. Not that my brothers haven't all had some too...

So I am most EXCITED to be welcoming a sweet little girl to what will most likely be our complete family. We have talked and pregnancy is just too hard on my body and therefor my family.

Most recently I have entered into the HOT FLASH stage of my pregnancy. Fun stuff when I feel like stripping down to my birthday suit in public. Especially when our high was 10 degrees yesterday. haha. I literally feel like someone takes a blow torch to my back!! It's awful. Happens at night in bed too. I also have been having episodes with low BP that cause me to "black out" or come close to fainting. Thankfully I haven't full out fainted yet!!! How scary when it's just me and the little man all day by ourselves...

20 weeks down. 20 or less to go until we get to meet our little lady! I cannot wait!!! In the mean time everyone is welcomed to start buying PINK (with the exception of pepto bismol pink) and PURPLE and lots and lots of hair bands/bows. Cuz if she is anything like her momma she won't have hair for years! :)

Terrible Two Tantrums

Most of the time I love nothing more than to brag about all the wonderfully cute things my little boy does but today. well, today is different kind of day. We have officially entered the stage of Terrible Twos I'm afraid. And while he is still really sweet and cute most of the time, those little moments when he isn't can ruin my whole day.

I've tried time outs (for us both)...

Deep breathing.

snacks.

naps.

getting breaks throughout the week by finding him a sitter.

rewards and praise when he is behaving.

Nothing seems to make my life any better when he is having one of those tantrums. Even though I know it will likely be over in 20 minutes time. I can't help but feel completely out of control for that short time. I know it's most likely a stage and we will get through it but GOLLY there are some days I just wanna go in my room and hide.

Reporting for Dr. Charlie Grahammy

this is what he refers to himself as sometimes. Other times when u ask (or tell) him if he is comfy, sweet, handsome, cute, smart etc He tells u "I Graham- Just Graham"...

He sings the clean up songs "Clean up clean up ERYBODY" "blankets away, blankets away, blankets away please"

He tells mommy "I do'd it" or "Graham do'd it" when he is asserting his independence and says "mom (or dad) do'd it hokay" when he wants to get out of doing something or is feeling lazy.

He makes towers out of everything and sees them everywhere... I was folding laundry today and he thought the "TOWEL TOWER!!!!" I made was pretty awesome.

today his grapes were "precious"

He leaves the room and tells everyone "Love u, see u soon"

He asks to go to bye bye in the "car in garage" and loves to go "SHOPPING" he yells "SHOPPING" everytime he sees the IGA!

He is curious. He asks "what do-nin mom?" "shhh listen, What's that noise/sound"...

He thinks he is clever (and he is) he insists u "frow it to me hokay" LOL! He will stand at the top of the stairs and "frow it to u mom"...

He has picked up a cute habit from his dad... If his dad whistles at me he tries "WHOO WHOOO" and he tells me I look "pretty" or "beautiful" in certain things.

He is my big boy and my SUNSHINE.

I love him.

He's Two...

He's really two...

Perhaps it's the pregnancy hormones, but his Mommy is not dealing well with this.



He now speaks in full sentences, 4, 5, 6 words long. And asks for exactly what he wants when he wants it.

He tells us when he is going to the bathroom (a step in the right direction for potty training).

He repeats things like "Oh goodness", "Ok?" & "Right?" after he asks for something, "sure Mom", and sounds so grown up.

He now gets himself out of his own bed and comes downstairs when he is awake.

He is becoming a good helper and learning how to share more.

Somedays he likes to pick out his own clothes. That is when he wants to get dressed...

He loves bubble baths and going shopping! :) My kind of boy.

He sings songs sometimes only after hearing it once. My new personal favorite is "tinkle tinkle little star"

He really strives to get words out right. His latest "cute saying" was 'Charlie Bucket' and none of us could figure out if it was an imaginary friend or what. Turns out he was only trying to say his own name. Which he now says is "Charlie Grahammy Rabbit (Rebbec)" LOL! Sometimes I wish he would still say "hocks and hoos" and call himself Charlie Bucket instead...

He is learning to be empathetic and aware of other's feelings and emotions. He asks "You OK?" after someone sneezes or coughs. He frequently checks on other kids/babies crying and makes others aware that they are upset. He tells us when he is really "happy" and really "mad".

He has good manners (for the most part) saying please and thank you and your welcome. This is important to me as a Mom. I really work on having an appreciative kiddo.

Most of all this little boy is my SUNSHINE everyday. He makes me so very happy and proud to be his Mommy. He is such a sweet sweet boy and it's such a pleasure watching him grow up.